youmeltmyhearttostone

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Saturday, July 26, 2008

How they love to play this mind boogling game with me.
It is indeed torturous and at the same time challenging.
Yet, everytime, i fall into their trap, like a souless fighter, willing to give up on everything, even life
yes i would. if u were to ask me lie down in the coffin and sleep forever, i would. But after all the tearful goodbyes and heartfelt lines.
Sometimes, my thoughts would really stray, sometimes i had this crazy thought that the both of them gang up tgt to put me through all this shit. Yes, it sounds insane. BUT. who knows,life is full of twist and turns, you would nv know what would happen next and who would turn your back to you. like what i did to her. its like some kind of betrayal, but i made sure that she had no feelings for him before we continued. still, sometimes, she appears to still like him. and yes, he will forever be etched in her memory. like 2402 is to me. So, i feel bad. and i think its my fault. feeling like a third party but not exactly.. AHH what the heck
i simply cannot forgot he was once hers. like if it was some other girls it would be fine. Because of this. i cant share my relationship, i cant have an open relationship, i have to hide like a mouse, and go through all the sucky feeling that normal relationships people would not have to undergo.
my minds a whirl. he is really nice. and yet i wonder whether theres an extra motive. now, im always on my guard. who can u trust?
rants
rants
rants
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RANDOMNESS!!
i got a medal for my sch's roadrun!! WHEEE!! i wanted to get top30! but realised that my stamina decreased. and i was totally off form. so i didnt. i was short of blood =x and the previous day i had stomachaches. visited the toilet lotsa times and also the doctors for MC! and i had a fall on my knee! BUT BUT, i got a medal for some team event!! top 6 for the hse and we came in 2nd! WOOTS! and our hse was the overall winner. this is kinda weird. haha ohya. but in fact im still lousy =x I ADMIT OKAY. my stamina is just better than ordinary girls and lousier than the pros. which means. if someone was to groom me to run, i would be a pro too!!! HAHA

omg. i totally know how to mood swing. how weird can i be.
well. thats CHERYL! ME!

seriously, i didnt want to continue us, but it seemed that he is so affected by it. well, i would be too. but this love is too demanding. and maybe he is putting on an act. maybe they both are! like when im sad. they will go HAHAHA serve her right behind my back.
okay im getting too paranoid =x

talking about being paranoid.. smth struck my mind!
JOKER. THE DARK KNIGHT.
love the joker character. damn awesome.
too bad he flew up to the sky alrdy.
but he is certainly one of the cooliest actor i chance upon.
so WOOTS! you rock that character Mr Heath Ledger
good job

and ARGH! i just deleted a whole chunk of words that i typed
DAMN
this is not my day.obviously not anyday seems to be
LALALALA

im a paranoid kid!! WHEEEE. lalalalla but im not crazy!

-ryl