youmeltmyhearttostone

A Penny of My Thoughts on A Quarter of the Journey.

I don't know how i ended up reading past conversations.

but while you were screaming and yelling things and weren't listening to me,

"you know how impossible it is for us"

"that we cannot give up anything for each other"

"because we'll never be too important for each other"

"to actually do something about what we dislike about each other."

actually I think we did, but we merely bottled up everything in instead of just truly accepting it. and each time things just explode when it hits the limit and the same problem arises each time. the time when I finally truly understood and decided to really accept, was simply just too late. we wanted freedom, and yet we wanted each other. Those two never could coincide because we didn't know how to, or we just couldn't.

"how can i be the one for you when i can't even be the one who can support you? how can i be the one when you're sick of the same old problems that i give you? how can i be the one when i can't do anything for you? you said i bring you to heaven and then hell, how about the many times when i was in that position? how can i be the one for you when we're always like this? how is it possible that i can ever be the one."

which is why i'm not.

i guess all this while, the times when we didn't have the guts to actually make a clean break, the times that we couldn't resist not having each other, or anything to separate us, the distance actually helped us make it happen.

i don't know whether i should be thankful or detest it. Or hate you because up till now you still have no guts to actually just say Get out of my Life, SHOO. But I'm just glad that I woke up(so that makes me more of a man than you are,hee) and there's actually something for me to learn from all that had has happened. and it also gave me a wonderful opportunity to realise that there are many wonderful people around me too. <3

the funny thing is, i ended up LOL-ing after reading because all the content was just ridiculous and totally retarded. and I gave up reading because everything was too silly and stupid. Indeed, adults are capable of having childish behaviours no matter how old or mature they claim to be. The relationship brought out the ugliest side of us and how I hate that part of me. I wish I can remove it, throw it away, cut it away, anything. But if you can't make the change, which I don't think I can because I tried like hell but still fail. So, embrace it! Make the best out of it! Although I have got no idea how to, I will definitely be able to figure things out one day.

I know I may sound alright now but at some point of time if I ever become that stupid emo girl and start to get affected by little stupid things again. You can't blame me because I have feelings and you can't expect me to just simply and so easily forget about everything, right!? Don't tell me I'm wrong. I won't accept it. haha!

Okay now I'm bored.

Entertainment please!